The Online Dating Version of Last Call

April 25th, 2012

Dating, OKCupid, Online Dating, Rejection

Name: Stephanie

Question: Hi,

I’ve been online dating for about 9 months. The first few months I received a decent amount of attention and responses. Some time after the six month mark it all stopped. I update my profile regularly and have added a couple of new photos. I used to get 1 or 2 responses for every dozen or so messages I send out. Now I don’t get any responses at all. What could be causing this?

Age: 38
State: NYC

 

Well, I can’t tell you for sure without looking at your profile. You can send me a message using the Submit a Dating Question link and I can take  a look at your ad. It might not have anything to with your profile. It could just be that you’ve been on that site for too long and have a bit of a funk on you. Meaning you’ve just been on that one site for too long and need a break. You’re not getting in front of enough new people and the current members have seen your profile so many times that they’re wondering why you’re still there.

There seems to be two distinct stages of online dating. The first 3 months or so where everybody is new to you and you’re new to them. And then the second stage where you become considered a “regular.”

I think people sometimes get resentful that it takes someone so long to finally reach out to them. They wonder if maybe the person is feeling desperate to some degree. I know that there are some men that I’ve emailed whose profile I viewed a couple months before and had sort of a “might as well” mentality when I contacted them. You do go through stages where you feel a bit worn down by the whole process. You just want a response or a date. Anything to prove to you that you still have the ability to catch someone’s eye.

I think when you get to the point where you’re just seeing the same profiles over and over, it’s time to take  a break from that site and focus on another one. Another approach is to disable your profiles for a few weeks. That way, when you return, there’s a whole new influx of members that you can contact without looking like you’re hanging around for last call.(TM one of my brilliant Twitter followers.)

We’ve all been contacted by those people, too. We know when we’re getting a message from someone who has been around that site for a long time and contacting anybody they think will respond. You can almost smell the flop sweat on their profile. They just try too hard to be witty and smooth.

I know most people hate the cut and paste jobs, but I prefer the simple “Hi, liked your profile” messages over the guys who try to crack jokes or feign interest in something I said in my profile. Overall, I prefer the people who take a less is more approach to online dating. The ones who post a dozen photos and go on about their musical tastes or try way too hard to sound intellectual or humorous actually turn me off.

The one thing I don’t like about OKCupid is that, because of the layout of the site, you’re frequently seeing the same people over and over again. Moreso than if you were doing a regular search. There are the people who pop up in that Activity column on your home page  and they’re almost always the same people over and over. The search function doesn’t let you pare down your search by distances of 5 to 10 miles so you’re forced to weed through people too far away. Since those same people are constantly changing their profiles, that means they are also hogging up spaces when you do a search for new profiles just added to the site. You end up seeing the same people over and over again.

The goal is to always be perceived as “new” I think. So, Stephanie, my suggestion is to take your profile down for a couple weeks, maybe get a few new photos taken, then return.

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31 Responses to “The Online Dating Version of Last Call”

  1. Craig Says:

    The goal is to always be perceived as “new” I think. So, Stephanie, my suggestion is to take your profile down for a couple weeks, maybe get a few new photos taken, then return. – Moxie

    The goal is to get a date. Unless Stephanie is reincarnated as someone else, she’s never going to be new. She notes that the first few months she received a decent amount of attention and responses. My question is: how many of those guys did she go out with? You’re supposed to strike while the iron is hot. A person’s profile is only going to come up in the searches of so many people because of the search parameters the others have put in. After the six month mark, everyone who’s active on the site who would be interested in you has seen you and you’re left with waiting for new people in your area to join. No matter how many new pictures you add or how much you update your profile, you’re still you. Thus you’re going to come up in the same searches by the same people no matter what changes you make – and no one’s going to write you twice.

    Instead of seeking responses and attention, she should be seeking dates. Stephanie is now a year older than when she started. With each year she ages, her online options will dwindle. If she thinks she’s geting no attention now, just wait until she turns 40. If I was her, I’d stop messing around, start revisiting some of the many responses she had (most of whom I’m betting she rejected), and go out with some of those guys. Your options are limited to whoever wants you, so pick from that pool. That goes for all of us. I’m sympathetic to those who get no responses, but not to those who got a lot of responses, but simply feel it wasn’t enough.

    Well-loved. Like or Dislike: Thumb up 21 Thumb down 2

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    • L. Says:

      I second and agree with your remarks. Take another look through the responses … chances are there are 1 or 2 or 3 that you could manage to go out with. Look at it as a blind date. No committments, no obligations. Have an exit plan if the thought of getting stuck bothers you. Many people end up in relationships from these situations.

      If she did go out with a sizable number of men from the responses that she did receive, my humblest apologies.

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      • Andthatswhyyouresingle Says:

        Who wants to “manage” to go out with someone? If they weren’t appealing the first time around, they won’t be a second time. Boo hoo.

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        • Craig Says:

          I once “managed” to go out with a woman whose wink I initially ignored because I found her unappealing the first time I looked at her profile. I had nothing else going on, so I upon second glance, I decided to give her a chance. We ended up dating for a year and remained friends afterwards. She was much better in person than her profile info and photos led me to believe. The moral: as cliche as the saying is, it really is true that you can’t always judge a book by it’s cover – especially when the cover is a webpage. You “manage” because you never know and you have nothing to lose by going on a date. I’d rather go out with 100 unappealing people in the hopes that one of them surprises me than sit home alone.

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          • joe-f Says:

            I agree with Craig. Due to some miscommunication, I didn’t call my wife until two weeks after I got her number. During our first call, I could barely understand her. During our first date, there were definitely things that I didn’t like about her. I could have bailed but I stuck with it.

            All those negative things that I ASSUMED about her was wrong. She was nervous on our call so that is why i didn’t understand her. Her other weak points were more than compensated by her strengths, which I couldn’t see until I dated her.

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            • L. Says:

              Exactly, Joe. I just don’t understand why there are so many pig-headed women with attitude out there who just can’t imagine this kind of thing happening. It’s very sad. It really is.

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            • Dimplz Says:

              I spent a couple of dates trying to figure out my guy and two years in, I’m very happy I did. I used to make too many snap judgments so I learned a lot from our relationship. I’m still learning :)

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        • L. Says:

          With all due respect, YOU should want to “manage” to go out with someone. Along with a whole lotta other people, Moxie. You don’t see it or understand it yet, but someday, you’ll look back and it will click. After it’s too late.

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          • Andthatswhyyouresingle Says:

            I DON’T HAVE TO!!!! That’s what you’re not getting. I don’t have to weed through my inbox and troll for dates. I get dates. I date people. I don’t have to sift through my inbox and recycle people to do that. You’re using fear as a way to get women to date you. Between the two of us, who seems more deluded???? How pathetic is it that you wish women would take pity on you or feel so broken down that they’ll go out with you? Dude, let it go.

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            • L. Says:

              Moxie … you’re projecting. You don’t know me. You don’t know how many dates I do or don’t get. For all YOU know, I could be married. So now who’s deluded?

              You’re also projecting some delusional thoughts when you say that I’m using fear. And that I’m trying to get women to date me. We’re all anonymous here. No one is going to know me or know to make any changes in their dating decisions when they meet me because of what they read here.

              You’re also projecting that I want anyone to take pity on me and go out with me as a result. Believe me, I don’t want that and I don’t need that.

              What’s so sad, Moxie, is that you see so many people here who agree with what I’m saying. So many people who provide examples that what I say works. And still you insist on not only chastising me, but going on the offenseive and insulting me. A truly “impartial” blogger or columnist would accept different trains of thought as input. That’s why I keep telling you that you need to get a dating coach or two to contribute here and respond to some of these questions.

              Here’s the deal, Moxie. You’re still single! You may get dates, but you’re still single. And the paradox is that your moniker is “Andthatswhyyoursingle”!!!!! Yet you can’t seen to manage to admit to yourself that although you do sometimes come up with some useful and helpful advice … that with all due respect, you have a very closed mind about dating. And that you have a lot to learn about dating SUCCESSFULLY… and that you are encouraging reinforncement of behaviors that don’t work for many people.

              I think it is YOU that needs to let it go. Or at least learn to accept that there are often other points of view on how to best deal with and be successful with dating. And learn how to not necessarily AGREE with those points of view, but learn how to ACCEPT them as input without being condescending and going on the offensive. It’s unbecoming of a mature woman who I would think wants to have credibility with her readers.

              Nuff said for me.

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              • Andthatswhyyouresingle Says:

                Nobody whois successful with dating comments this much. Nobody. You’ve admitted you get no responses. What, did you magically find a girlfriend in 6 weeks?

                The only people who. Agree withyou are the people likeyou. Other people don’t bother with you because they don’t care enough about you to do so.

                Whether I’m in a relationship or not is irelevant because I’m not the one complaining. I’m not sitting here day in and day out pontificating about how things should be. I’m out there actually dating. I’m happy.

                I’m not a journalist or a coach. I’m someonewho writes her opinons. You keep grasping at straws tryingto make this about my narrow view point when I’M NOT THE ONE COMPLAINING.

                I’m notlooking for marriage right now. I’m dating and enjoying it. You canteven get someone to reply to you on Match. You’ve admitted it. So stop with the attempts at shaming me. You’re embarrassing yourself more. Whatthe hell do you know about dating successfully? You spend half your time here whining.

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              • DrivingMeNutes Says:

                To me, it’s fair to advise a woman who is struggling to “lower her standards” or re-evaluate expectations or whatever nice way you need to put it. I’ve given that same advice. It’s not new. The problem with L’s advice is that he doesn’t limit his advice to the woman who are struggling. He can’t acknowlegde that some women have plenty of options, don’t struggle, and don’t need to lower their standards to accomodate men. He views all women as complainers. And, all men as having difficulty.

                If I follow the logic of L and others, the premise is that men start out “good” but learn to act like jerks because they have been repeatedly scorned by these high-valued women who refuse to lower their standards. Over time, these men become jaded and develop a counter-strategy of dating lots of women, refusing to commit, i.e. they become undesirable “jerks.” In other words, men behave “badly” as a kind of punishment for women’s misconduct. If only women would lower their standards, and not be so picky, everyone would be better off because men would commit, would stop dating around and being jerks and womankind would finally get what it want.s.

                This is such unbelievable nonsense. I can say for myself that the reason I date lots of women is because I LOVE women and want to have as many around me as possible all the time. I don’t feel abused. I don’t feel scorned. I don’t feel the desire to punish anyone. I appreciate the attention I get from women. If all women became perfect angels, and never scorned me, and catered to my every whim, I’d want to date even more of them. All at once. I can’t imagine I’m the only man that doesn’t have bad experiences with women.

                So, in other words, this so-called “bad” male behavior is not caused by women’s scorn and rejection – if anything, it is caused by woman’s availability. I’m a victim of possitive reinforcement, not negative. I don’t commit because I have options, not because I lack them. Same for women. People with options exercise them. So your advice is the exact opposite of what a woman with options should be doing.

                As an aside, I think most guys, when they were young, experienced “scorn” from girls. What most men learn as they grow up is that much of that rejection is in their own heads. I love the movie High Fidelity. A lot of guys do, I think. Why? Because it rings true. See it if you haven’t. In the movie,. John Cusack’s character realizes, while reliving all his past failed relationships, that HE was the one doing a lot of the rejecting. This is a common male experience and that, along with the perfect rendition of every female archetype is what makes the movie powerful (to me, at least.) How it is possible that some guys haven’t figured this out yet, and moved past it, I’ll never know. Anyway, if you can’t move past it, bummer for you. And, more for me.

                The bottom line is: If you are lecturing to women “with options” that they should date down in order to make the world a better place for men (whether you or other men), it’s not only bad advice but pointless because no one with options – male or female, is going to give them up for your sake.

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                • L. Says:

                  In point of fact, I’ve said a number of times that if what you are doing is working for you, keep doing it. I never said that all women are complainers and never said that all men have difficulties. And I never advised anyone to “date down”. This just goes to show that you haven’t taken the time to really give what I am saying the proper thought and consideration. The fact that you attach words like “date down” to it shows YOUR bias, not mine. I never used words like that to describe what I suggest. With all respect, this wreaks of someone who just doesn’t want to listen and doesn’t want to have an open mind.

                  Let me point out something to you that others have noted here. There are a large number of women (and perhaps men too for all I know) in the 40+ category who in fact DO NOT end up in relationships. Many of the same faces appear over and over again on the party circuit in NYC. A large number of the same faces appear over and over again on internet dating sites apparently NOT getting into LTRs. Want to deny that most people want LT committed relationships because you want to rationalize this behavior? Fine, deny it. But I’m just sayin’ … yes, there may be women who have options. But for a large number, that is not the case. And for others, they may THINK they have options, but in reality … if they really admit it to themselves, they are ending up in the same place over and over again having been unsuccessful in finding a “suitable” guy.

                  I don’t expect you (or Moxie … or most single women here) to agree. But that’s ok. Sobeit.

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                  • DrivingMeNutes Says:

                    K

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                  • Andthatswhyyouresingle Says:

                    Why do you care so much then??? Seriously….why do you exert so much energy over these supposed lost souls??? The only reason you harp on this is because you hate the fact that a woman wouldrather stick to what’s she’s doing, successful or not, than date you. You’re as pissed off as the woman in the article about the spreadsheet guy. you can’t bear to.accept that women would rather be alone than go out with you. You’re as obnoxious and annoying as the women who traipse in here and yap about how men can’t make decent conversation or just want sex. You both will do whateverit takes to demonize anybody that doesn’t show interest in you rather than actually become attractive enough to find what you’re looking for. Nobody listens to your lectures because they’re just transparent rants.

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                    • L. Says:

                      Moxie … I mean the following with all due respect, even though I’m going to be very pointed about it.

                      First of all, again … you make many assumptions about me … someone that you don’t even know. These assumptions are based on your perception, and your perception is something that you place into your own mind. Expected, because that’s precisely the flaw behind the way so many people make dating decisions.

                      Let me try to address a few of your points:

                      “Nobody whois successful with dating comments this much. Nobody. You’ve admitted you get no responses.”

                      What gives you the right to arrive at this conclusion? First of all, successful? How many of us are TRULY successful? Most of us want a committed LTR or marriage. I am successful in getting dates just as you claim you are. I’d still rather have met the right person and be married to them. That’s my goal. Next, maybe I DO care a lot … maybe even a little too much. But I stand by my beliefs and principles even if it does seem excessive to you. And I have the b_lls to do so. I’m what some people would describe as tenacious. Many people do this in all areas of life. They are passionate about what they believe in. Without people like that, the world would be without leaders, and wouldn’t be the same place. To equate that passion with a perceived ability to be in a relationship is simply a defense mechanism on your part to prevent you from giving the issue consideration putting it on me because you insist that you must be right. And somehow, you manage to equate this to me being a loser.

                      I also never said that I get NO responses. Yes, I have said that my friends and I (and many others here) have difficulty getting responses via internet dating. And this is a substantial problem for many many men trust me. Also, internet dating is NOT the only way to get dates. So to conclude from this that I am some kind of helpless socially inept dateless loser is something that you invent in your mind, and is not rooted in any kind of truth. And as someone else said, it’s an attack that just isn’t necessary and shouldn’t come from someone truly impartial wanting input and opinions from people on her blog. The difference with me is I’m not afraid to express my opinion, in spite of the fact that you have interpreted it as some kind of desperation (which is a risk I was willing to take).

                      “The only people who agree with you are the people like you”.

                      You know what? You’re right! But you know what? The only people who agree with YOU are the people like YOU! That’s the way life is. People have opinions, some agree with them and some don’t. So basically, you seem to think you have the pompous “authority” to label me and people who agree with me as “losers” and yourself and people who agree with you as “winners” … even though it’s arguable at best as to whether you’re any more successful at finding relationships than we are. That’s utterly ridiculous, and you lose credibility with your readers every time you promote an idea like that.

                      “Whether I’m in a relationship or not is irelevant because I’m not the one complaining. I’m not sitting here day in and day out pontificating about how things should be. I’m out there actually dating. I’m happy”.

                      If you’re truly happy by just being on the “dating circuit”, that’s great. My hats off to you. I question that, but I suppose some people are just like that (although some THINK they are happy with that kind of life, but underneath it all are just not admitting to themselves that they really do want more). So while you MAY not be the one who is “complaining”, you post questions and entries on your blog where women DO complain. And there are plenty of examples outside your blog where women DO complain that they can’t meet the right guy and are NOT open-minded enough … usually because they are in a pattern where they continue to be drawn towards the wrong men. I’ve had women admit this to me, Moxie and have seen/heard them admit it to others … so I know it’s true. So just know that my thoughts here are not necessarily targeted at you personally. If you are happy, then I suggest you go on your merry way. I think if you look back through my posts, you’ll generally find this to be true, with this being the only entry where it’s gotten kinda personal about you and it’s only because you attacked.

                      “I’m not a journalist or a coach. I’m someonewho writes her opinons. You keep grasping at straws tryingto make this about my narrow view point when I’M NOT THE ONE COMPLAINING.”

                      But you ARE a journalist because you author this blog. So if you don’t want to make any effort to provide value to your readers by giving them useful impartial advice from professionals or people who are knowledgeable about how to succeed in dating, sobeit. If this blog is all about YOUR opinion, you have to understand that there are going to be others who have opinions also … many of which will NOT agree with yours. You need to accept that. If it’s not me, it’ll be someone else … trust me.

                      “I’m not looking for marriage right now. I’m dating and enjoying it. You canteven get someone to reply to you on Match. You’ve admitted it. So stop with the attempts at shaming me. You’re embarrassing
                      yourself more. Whatthe hell do you know about dating successfully? You spend half your time here whining.”

                      Like I said, good for you … although I’m not sure that you’re being honest with yourself. If you are, that’s great. Enjoy.I don’t know where you got this business that I can’t even get someone to reply to me on match. I don’t recall ever saying that. I do recall saying that most men I know have a substantial challenge with getting responses.

                      And getting or not getting responses on match does not make someone more or less knowledgeable about dating successfully. You really have a lot to learn about people. Half my time? Come on now, Moxie. Who’s REALLY embarrassing herself?

                      Bottom line, why must you go on the attack? There are other people who have questioned your opinion here and somehow, you feel the need to label them as losers also. All because they don’t agree with you? Is that really behavior that is becoming of a mature woman who’s opinions people should value?

                      I gotta tell you Moxie … the way you come across … is like an angry, hard-nosed, hardened b_tch. No compassion, no sensitivity, no empathy, no thoughtfulness, not an ounce of kindness in any of your posts. Nothing wrong with being direct, but you have that attitude that many single people have of “I’ve been burned, and I’m not going to let it happen again … so I’m gonna be a hardass about everything”. Forgive me, but those kinds of qualities will never get you anywhere.

                      Hot debate. What do you think? Thumb up 6 Thumb down 4

                    • Crotch Rocket Says:

                      Moxie … I mean the following with all due respect, even though I’m going to be very pointed about it.
                      More importantly, please learn to be brief about it. You won’t win arguments through the sheer volume of bullshit you spew; people will just start ignoring you.

                      I’m what some people would describe as tenacious.
                      That’s a nice word people use to describe themselves when, in reality, they’re stubborn: they tenaciously cling to their ideas, no matter how wrong those ideas may be. This is similar to women describing themselves as “strong and independent” when, in reality, they’re being aggressive bitches.

                      The only people who agree with YOU are the people like YOU!
                      Wrong. Many other people here, including me, agree with Moxie (at least most of the time) despite being rather different people.

                      So while you MAY not be the one who is “complaining”, you post questions and entries on your blog where women DO complain.
                      That’s the main format of Ask Moxie: posting reader questions. Many of those questions contain complaints–and generate many more from other readers. However, complaints in particular provide educational opportunities, and helping people is the entire point. You can’t do that without addressing the complaints.

                      And there are plenty of examples outside your blog where women DO complain that they can’t meet the right guy and are NOT open-minded enough
                      So point to those examples rather than making sweeping, absolute generalizations that do not apply to all women (or men, as the case may be).

                      I’ve had women admit this to me, Moxie and have seen/heard them admit it to others … so I know it’s true.
                      Right, because if a woman says something, it has to be true. The words tumble forth like manna from heaven without any need to apply logic or critical thinking to them.

                      But you ARE a journalist because you author this blog.
                      No, she’s just another random blogger on the Internet. Bloggers claiming to be “journalists” is one of the more notable frauds of our era.

                      there are going to be others who have opinions also … many of which will NOT agree with yours.
                      Of course there will be. Opinions are like assholes: everyone has one and they all stink. I disagree with Moxie now and then, and we get along just fine. It’s a free country; you all have the right to be wrong. (tongue in cheek)

                      Like or Dislike: Thumb up 3 Thumb down 2

                    • DrivingMeNutes Says:

                      .”I never said that all women are complainers and never said that all men have difficulties”

                      Yes, you do. You assume that all single women are unhappy. Read your own comments. Those women that you see on the Internet year after year, still single? Not living the ideal life that you’ve prefer they have? Moxie. She doesn’t even KNOW she’s unhappy right? In your imagination, these women need your help. In reality, they don’t. I’m trying not to get personal. But, clearly you are making assumptions.

                      I drink your milkshake.

                      Like or Dislike: Thumb up 5 Thumb down 0

                • Crotch Rocket Says:

                  I can’t imagine I’m the only man that doesn’t have bad experiences with women.
                  Not even one? Yeah, you may be unique. I’ve had plenty of bad experiences–but in retrospect, they were mostly my own damn fault. I don’t blame women. You’re not going to like everyone you meet, and that includes people you meet while dating. Some people just suck, not because they’re women (or men) but because they’re people. And that’s okay. Rather than wasting my time thinking about them or wallowing in misery about what they’ve said/done, I focus on the people who don’t suck–and help those here who honestly want to learn how to suck less themselves.

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                  • DrivingMeNutes Says:

                    Bad dates are like assholes. Everyone has them. And I care about my bad dates almost as much.

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    • uesider Says:

      Wow, pretty blunt but I can’t argue with it. I guess for some, “Mr. Big” is seemingly going to emerge from the rest of the members and contact her, and only her.

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    • Mark Says:

      For the most part agree with Craig. Just as you are probably seeing the same people/profiles over and over, they are seeing you. Same product, different package. I don’t know if your reply rate is average or not. Can’t say. So I guess is there a match/mismatch between the type of guy you are looking for vs. what you bring to the table.

      I mention that because I would guess that the same type of guy (generally speaking) that you would be looking for is pretty much the same guy that a number of other women are also looking for. Basically, a few men are getting a lot of attention , a few no attention, and the vast majority a little attention. Probably the same holds true for women.

      If it seems that it is more and more like work, instead of something enjoyable, then take a break from it and re evaluate things. But if it comes across that you are just going through the motions then that mode of thinking is transmitted very easily. Not many like the company of someone who is the jaded cynic. Go out, relax and enjoy those things you like to do with people you enjoy your company .

      Best of luck

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  2. Andthatswhyyouresingle Says:

    I strongly advise people to make use of the Hide feature on OKCupid. I literally go through profiles by age range and career field and hide anybody that looks unappealing. The search function on that site blows and you never get to see the truly new profiles

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  3. bill Says:

    Ask one of your friends who is in a super successful relationship to go through your messages and pick out the guys for you.

    You obviously have a problem with picking non available men continuously.

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  4. Erine Says:

    Why did Moxie and the Nuts guy jump on the L’s neck? He made a very reasonable argument that single ladies over a certain age should be more flexible if they want to get a relationship. Moxie herself spends hours on this collumn and then accuses the guy of doing the same. The Nuts guy seems a bit deluded too with all his options, etc. Moxie, in all honesty you have been writing this column for years but t he re has not been a real relationship doesnt it mean that you are not very qualified to dole out dating advice? I agree with you on sime things abiut untergender competition, women being unrealistic, etc, but in the ling run how do you take math lessons frim a person who doesnt know math? and i am not talking about tour marital status, just relationships. Also, as moderat por you CANNOT iunsult your users and he so aggressive towarda them. Thats plain unprofessional.

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    • Andthatswhyyouresingle Says:

      You pretty much say the same thing in every comment. It’s blah blah blah passive aggressive swipe at Moxie blah blah blah. Talk about repetitive nonsense. It’s the same thing literally year in and year out with you. And yet you still read. And I’m supposed to take you seriously? I’m supposed to care that you – some anonymous internet troll – don’t feel I’m qualified to give advice? You’ve been commenting here for , what, 4 years? Obviously I’m doing something right.

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      • Erine Says:

        In these four years ive had a few relationships out of which one was bordering on proposal and the latest one resulted in an actual engagement soon to be wedding so maybe its time to start forwarding thevquestions to me (nit that i want it). As you have prib noticed i rarely post and ratrly read. I do because its entertauning.
        Your strength is that u are not gender biased un ur responses unlike most female dating adviswrs. Ur weakness is that you often attack pple. Like you just have to have the last word and come back wuth a a respinse stronger than that of your opponent. But you know sometimes pple impression in person jusst think differently so thats why they write something differently, its not am attack on you. You make a much more pleasant impression in person btw. you vime off as simeone non bitchy and not very bitter unlike this blog.

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    • Crotch Rocket Says:

      Moxie herself spends hours on this collumn and then accuses the guy of doing the same.
      This site is part of Moxie’s business, i.e. it’s her job to be here. What’s his excuse?

      you have been writing this column for years but t he re has not been a real relationship
      How would you know? She has learned from her past mistakes and now doesn’t advertise her dating life, which was one of the main things preventing her from having a healthy relationship.

      how do you take math lessons frim a person who doesnt know math?
      Obviously, you don’t, but you also shouldn’t take lessons (in anything) from someone who has never made any mistakes because they won’t have any useful advice when you make mistakes.

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      • Andthatswhyyouresingle Says:

        The people who drag out the “what do you know you’re single” insults only do it in hopes ill discuss my personal life. They’re pissed I’m not discussing my personal life. They need their shadenfraude fix so they can feel better about their lives. The last thingthey want to hear is that things are actually going well.

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        • Erine Says:

          Not the case. You would have to he a complete bitcj to take pleasure and some type of validation lidation in the fact that a stranger s life isnt going well. Im only glad when u hear that simeone s life is going well unless they strangle animals ir molest kids. Uf ur datung is goung well, great. ni need for me to taie comfort in a contrary vd ituatiom as im geeting married and am not even ,,30 yet.nneed

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    • DrivingMeNutes Says:

      That’s Mr. Nutes to you.

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