Boyfriend and I want to buy an apartment together. I asked my parents for a loan. They said they’d help me buy a place of my own but not one with him. They said I’m too young and haven’t been dating him long enough for me to make such an investment and that it’s too risky. I’m 22 and been dating him a year. Advice? – Nerve Confessions
I thought this might make for an interesting discussion.
First, there is the financial aspect of this scenario. Maybe I’m old fashioned, but in theory buying an apartment with someone you’ve been dating all of a year – at 21/22 no less – seems like a huge financial risk.
I’d also be uncomfortable moving in with someone – at any age – where it was just his name on the paperwork. There just doesn’t seem to be any security in that.
How does one handle the legal aspects of co-habitation? Do you request that your name be put on the lease or mortgage? Or do you just cross your fingers and hope it works out and decide to think about the rest later?
Do you do credit checks on each other? Would you really reconsider living together if their credit or financial history doesn’t appear to be as sound as you’d like it to be?
What if the person you’re thinking of moving in with has never fully financially supported themselves? Would that be a concern?
As far as the poster’s age goes, when did people start moving in together at such a young age? I freely admit that I am an Old and could be out of touch. But is it me or does it seem that people move in together much more quickly these days? There was a time when living together meant you and your partner were on your way to something more long term. Now it feels as though this is just something people do and don’t put much thought in to it other than it will help them cut down on expenses.
I also wanted to discuss the whole renting vs. owning thing. Eliza brought up in a comment recently how she met a man who lived in a less than stellar apartment. She pointed out that it was a rental. Do people really care about whether or not someone rents versus owns? Why or why not?