Question: I have been going to singles events for the past year and have found that the men are nice but that most of them are less educated and make less money than I do and that it is an issue for the men. Any recommendations on affordable ways to meet men between the ages of 35-50 in NYC who have a six or seven figure annual income and who want to have a serious relationship?
Is it really an issue for the men..or an issue for you? Because most men couldn’t care less if a woman makes more than them or who has a “better” education. They just don’t like to be with women who lord it over them in some way.
To answer your question, the very harsh reality is that if a man is making seven figures, he’s not looking for a woman who is looking for a man who makes seven figures unless he’s just looking for a trophy. In which case, that was about 10 or 12 years ago for you. Men who make that kind of bank are probably beating women off with sticks or serially dating with no intention of settling into anything serious. Why should they? They have their money and their freedom. Why would they want to risk losing both just to have one woman? Answer: They wouldn’t.
You could join a high end gym if you’re determined to meet these guys. That’ll cost you, though. There is no such thing as an “affordable” way to meet men pulling down 7 figures. Those guys aren’t chilling at Jamba Juice or at the local New York Sports Club. They’re at expensive places. Of course, you’ll have to take a number and wait your turn in order to talk to them, let alone date them. You will have some stiff competition from the hostess at the latest trendy restaurant and girl who works at Sephora or Victoria’s Secret. Yes, that’s right. These guys don’t care about education or money. They care about one thing – that you’re hot. Little else matters.
I doubt these men you’re meeting are bothered that you make a lot of money. My guess is they don’t like your expectations and demeanor because of it. Are you not offering to pay the tab or contribute? Are you frequently trying to plan expensive dates? Do you always need to go out? There’s your answer.
If you’re chatting up some guy at a singles event and talking about where you work and where you went to school and about all your not at all interesting but you think they make you sound cultured/educated hobbies, you immediately pegged as one of “those” women. The ones who can’t make conversation without asking, “So, what do you do?” In short, you’re deemed uptight, shallow and boring. Hot or not, nobody cares. Men with money are happy to spend that money on women they genuinely like to be around and who show appreciation.
If it’s a relationship you seek, then you’re better off looking at the five and maybe six figure guys. Those guys are every where. Public transportation, Starbucks, they gym, etc. There are plenty of six figure guys who attend wine tastings and speeddating events and singles events.They also join athletic groups and gyms. If you’re looking for the 200K+ a year guy, I think you might be out of luck. Most of those guys aren’t looking for a relationship. The ones who are, I’d bet, aren’t ones you would date. Funny how that works, amirite?
You probably have options. You just don’t like any of them. So I think you need to decide what it is exactly that you want and then ask yourself if you’re being realistic.